Art & Soul Post #4 by Mary Davidson
I grew up going to church but not reading the bible. I have always been told that there is a God and that He lives in Heaven which is a very nice place to be. I was told He watches over us, guides us, and loves us like no other could. I have long believed that a person does not have to be in a particular building on a particular day of the week in order to have God in their life. At age twenty, I felt God wanted me to find my own path…to see what I could do “on my own” first. Basically, my thinking was that life wouldn’t always be happy, but it wouldn’t always be sad either. I felt I was the deciding factor in my never-ending cycle of feelings and questioning my existence on earth. I consistently followed the Golden Rule, but that wasn’t enough. I married twice and divorced twice. Neither time did I expect to be left so hurt for so long. However, good things also came from those marriages: I am a mother to three birth children, two stepchildren, and two adopted children. I am currently a grandmother of ten with one more and a great-grandchild on the way…I love each one of them!
After twenty-five years of marriage, my second husband and I had decided to sell our joint-owned business and retire. Three weeks before the final sale date, it was brought to my attention that we didn’t share the same plans. We both wanted to sell and we both wanted to head south and have fun… but my husband’s plan did not include me. It included someone else— a woman less than half our age. During the next three weeks, I had to commute and deal with lawyers and banks and new owners and…”them”.
I was around a lot of people, but so alone. I was so deeply overwhelmed that I needed to feel loved even if it was by a minuscule amount — just to keep going.
I did a lot of thinking while I was driving back and forth. One night, I missed my turn and ended up driving by a “mission” church called Saint Mary’s. I purposely drove by it again the next day. I looked at the hours posted on the sign and decided to come back on Wednesday night for their prayer service. I got there in plenty of time. I walked up to the door to go in, but the door wouldn’t open. I thought to myself, “Wow! God doesn’t even want to see me. How can I be that bad?” I was devastated. I went to bed thinking, “What’s the point? Why bother?”
The next week was horrible at every turn. My husband was so mean and degrading towards me as he flaunted the new love of his life in front of everyone…including me. I had to find a way to survive this newest nightmare. I really needed to have God on my side…but, the door…His door…wouldn’t open. One night on the way back to the place where I was staying, I was talking to myself…trying to get through my turns correctly so I could just be done for the day. I had nothing left in me. Then, I noticed I was headed towards St. Mary’s where I had stopped at just the week before. I said to myself, “Hmpf! I wonder…” I thought I immediately heard, “Try again.” I pulled in and parked. I waited to see if anyone else would pull in so I could see them go inside. You know…to see if the door would open this time. No one else came. I again heard, “Try again.” This time, I actually responded aloud, “Okay! Okay!” I got out of the car and headed to the only door that made sense to try. I hesitated. I reached out, pulled the handle, and it opened. I thought to myself, “Wow, now what?”
I realized God had brought me there…to this church…at this time…and I should go in and listen to whatever He wanted to say to me. I saw lots of open pews. In fact, there was only one man there. He was up by the altar, just sitting there…waiting. I sat quietly in my pew in hopes I could keep it together and not embarrass myself in front of others. I was practically in tears from the moment I sat down until the time I left. I just kept sobbing and saying quietly:
“Lord, please forgive me. I am totally lost without You. Thank You for not leaving me. Last week, I thought You didn’t love me anymore. I thought I was doomed forever. I’ve missed You. Please, please don’t ever leave me…I CANNOT do this life alone. Thank You for staying near me! I am so sorry for letting You down. Please don’t let me go. I need You so much! Please show me the way back into Your heart.”
Part of my prayers was spoken in tears, but it felt right. It felt good. I felt better. The man had started praying when I had started praying, and then he finished praying as I did. There was literally NO ONE ELSE in the church. Once the man was done, he walked straight over to me and put his arms around me…and blessed me. He was a big man, like a gentle giant. His words were soft and warming to my heart. For the life of me, I can’t remember what exactly he said… however, I’ll never, ever forget that feeling of love and safety when he put his arms around me. I totally believe that God Himself somehow came forth from him and into me. With that feeling, I instantly began to believe I was meant for more…more of Him! I wasn’t sure what that would mean, but I believed He would help me figure it out. We, God and I, have been together since that evening, hand in hand. We are rather inseparable!
I will never forget that night. It was like He lifted me out of the waters of tears I was drowning in. I was so ready to give up, and He spoke to me. He continues to keep me above those stormy waters, and I still hold His hand to my heart and bow my head. He is how I breathe now. I’m stronger than I have ever been because of Him. My first favorite scripture passage was 2 Samuel 22:17-20. When I read it, I could envision His hand reaching for me…my hand reaching for His. When I start to wonder if He would ever leave me, I stop and remember: He wasn’t the one who left in the first place; I was the one who left Him. I am not doing that again!
The Lord reached down from above and grabbed me.
He pulled from the deep water. He saved me from my powerful enemies, who hated me.
They were too strong for me, so he saved me.
They attacked me in my time of trouble, but the Lord was there to support me.
He was pleased with me, so he rescued me. He took me to a safe place.
2 Samuel 22:17-20
I became determined to learn more about Him. I was invited to a small church by my friend that I was staying with. I expected to have people smile at me in a church, but it was really amazing when they smiled while they were singing! Hmm… I didn’t know that was a “thing”. Once the service was over, I decided I wanted to come back to this church. I went out and bought a bible; it had drawings that I could color on almost every page! I was amazed! I love to color things…and draw things. This was so very helpful as it made my reading so much easier! It was like God could read my mind! For years, I had ignored the artistic gift God had given me as a child because nothing had made me feel creative…until I found this bible art! Who knew that this was a “thing”? I didn’t. The more I read and colored…the more I relaxed and the more I would draw things. Nothing in particular, but I was learning to be happy with Him… and I began to “feel” the words I read. My trust, my faith, and my inner artist began to come alive! Sometimes, I would just sit and look at a piece, and I would say, “Wow, where did that come from?” Then I’d look up and say, “Thank you!” That still happens! I am in awe of God’s creative influences – He’s amazing!
During the fall of 2020, I began attending a ladies’ Christian group in my community. We called it Women In Need of God’s Strength (W.I.N.G.S). I drew a warrior woman with wings as a logo for our group. One of the younger women in the group gave me an instruction bible to help me find things and learn things faster. She gave me a personal note with it. To thank her, I decided to do my very first “verse art” piece (scripture displayed in a colorful and creative manner) and gave it to her. Then I drew my first God-inspired Christmas card. Wow! Art was back in my life! I couldn’t be happier for being able to experience all of it! I so love the whispers from Him when I hear a bible verse spring to life in my mind. His words come alive as brightly colored rainbows from heaven…and I thank Him for His help in guiding my hands to show His creative nature. He is a creative genius!
This isn’t anything I had planned to do as an artist. I’ve tried many things, but nothing has made my heart fuller than putting color and feeling into the very words I hear from Him. I keep thinking…if someone would’ve done this for me when I was young, my attention would’ve been drawn to Him a lot sooner! There is a season for everything under heaven, and I am forever grateful that He has chosen this season for me to help His Words come alive! I hope you enjoy my art. It is my honor and pleasure to serve Him.
Blessings to You All,
-Mary
Mary Davidson
Scripture illustration artist and founding member of Redeemer's Heart
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1 thought on “Scripture Art Speaks From the Heart”
Thank you Mary for sharing your story! I even had the privilege to hear it in person at the “All In “Women’s seminar today. Your story is so inspiring and it warmed my heart! Our good Father had this planned for you way in advance. Sometimes we need to suffer a little while until He can show us what He created us for. Just like Jesus had to suffer, something amazing happened later! He saved us all! God bless you, Mary ❤️